Confession time: I’ve never been very good at play or make believe. This might not come as a surprise to those of you who know me, but as a kid, I liked to spend my time organizing, planning, setting up, and creating projects and activities. I would spend all my time “getting ready” to play, and then get bored really quickly when it came time to actually settle in and play or make believe.
So, as a mama, I sometimes feel out of my element when my kids want me to just “play”. I’m not good at barbies, or pirates… and don’t even get me started on how one “plays shopkins”.
I used to feel a bit jealous of how excited the kids would get when when Jeff would come home, and they would be all over him to play. He is clearly the more fun parent. And it’s not that I was jealous of him exactly – but rather of that connection they had, and the fear that if he was the “fun parent”… then by default, I must be the boring one.
It’s take some time, but now, several years into this whole motherhood thing, I’m finally figuring out that it’s a good thing Jeff and I interact with our kids differently, and that they come to us to have different needs met. Perhaps there’s actually some design in this. Maybe it seems obvious to you reading this, but it was something I needed to learn – and stop feeling guilty about.
When my kids want to bake cookies, colour, or make a craft – I’m the one they come to. When they scrap a knee or feel sick, they need mama cuddles. When they wake up in the night, it’s my side of the bed they approach.
This ever-changing role of “mama” isn’t something I think we can ever perfect – or even need to – and thankfully, I’m learning to embrace all parts of it. It’s actually freeing to recognize that I don’t actually need to be all things at all times.
And when it IS me they need, I – along with all my imperfection as a mama – am actually just right.
Dress from PinkBlush
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